Would You Like A Bacon Sandwich?

I was reminded of this story tonight, while I was typing up another one, its very short, I hope you’ll like it.

I’d just sat down to eat my lunch, when my sister’s boyfriend walked in, with one of his friends. Being the polite fourth grader that I was, I asked our company if they would like a bacon sandwich too. Never one to turn down free food, her boyfriend said “yes, I’d like one.” his friend politely declined.  I went into the kitchen and fried more bacon, made his sandwich, and took it to him. I don’t know if it was the smell of the bacon, or if he’d just decided he was hungry, but his friend changed his mind and said, “that looks pretty good, may I have one?” “coming right up!” I said, returning to the kitchen. When I opened the refrigerator, you can imagine my embarrassment, when I saw we were out of bacon. Don’t ever let it be said that nine-year-olds aren’t resourceful. as I was looking in the refrigerator, for more bacon, I found the quart jar of bacon GREASE, my mother kept, for cooking. I remembered seeing some small pieces of bacon mixed in with the grease , when mom was pouring it out of the skillet. Problem solved! all I had to do, was figure out how to get all those tiny pieces of bacon out of that grease. Back in those days, we didn’t have a garbage disposal, we had, what was called, a garbage drainer. it was a triangular pan, with holes in the bottom of it, that fit in the corner of your sink. People would dump their garbage (uneaten and partially eaten food, mainly. rotten vegetables, potato peels…etc. you get the picture.) in this pan, then at the end of the day, wrap the garbage in newspaper, and throw it in the trash. I honestly don’t remember if I dumped the garbage out of the drainer first, but I do know I dumped that quart jar of grease in that garbage drainer, so I could pick the bacon bits out. I can’t tell you how old some of those bacon bits had to have been, but I know my mom probably had that jar of grease, longer than she’d had me. Anywho, I picked all those little pieces of bacon, out of that grease/garbage, and fried them up like they were new, put them on some bread with some mustard, and voila! A bacon sandwich fit for a………….sister’s boyfriend’s friend. I carried that sandwich in to him proudly, handed it to him, “here you go, enjoy!” all I can say is, that dude’s mom must’ve been a terrible cook, because he ate that sandwich like it was the best he ever had. The moral here is : If I ask you if you want a bacon sandwich, just say no!